Living in Sydney as I do, and daring to confess that I have a great deal of admiration for Lloyd Jones is a bit like confessing that I have engaged in cannibalism (without inhaling, of course), or some equally heinous crime. In other parts of the world (like the reformed circles of Wales, or I am given to understand, Korea), having anything negative to say about the Doctor is far worse than the odd spot of cannibalism. So, I thought I'd jump into the fray with both feet (my own, in case you are wondering), and add my two cents to all the reflections on the good Doctor - Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones.
First, a basic introduction for those of you with no background knowledge. Lloyd-Jones was a Welsh doctor, of the medical persuasion, who left medicine to preach. He wound up preaching in posh old London town, which he did without any discernible compromise, continuing to pray even when bombs were falling. (He was talking to God after all). He preached voluminously, spending 12 years preaching just through Romans. He loved the Puritans and is part of the reason why puritans have been republished through the Banner of Truth publishers (which he was involved in setting up). So, many puritan classics are now cheap and accessible. He longed for revival and really thought it could happen, drinking deeply from his Welsh heritages where revivals were part of the blood of the church.*
He was also incredibly eccentric. He went to the beach in a three piece suit and a bowler hat. And had a bizarre cure for sea-sickness, I seem to remember. He had little sense of humour, yet he was a really good listener, from accounts of people who knew him. I got the impression that he could be a tricky man to live with, being a determined, fairly intense kind of man with a slight sense of the practical.
He seems to have had a sense of purpose and direction that caught people up, and written recollections of him often read as hagiography. I'm pretty sure he would not be amused by them. Most of his preaching was transcribed and comes to us today in written sermon form as 'commentaries' on certain books of the Bible.
I feel I owe him a debt, for several reasons:
1. I used to babysit when I was 17 or so, and I got paid in Lloyd-Jones book. I considered this an excellent currency and still remember reading his commentaries on Ephesians in the train. I loved what he had to say. It was clear and real, and started to shift me from basing my faith on my own pietism and need to choose, to realising that God was bigger than I, and that I lived my life in his hands.
2. He wrote about suffering, and gave me the categories to know that God controls reality even when it changes colour, disintegrates and everything you 'know' is turned inside out. It would have been very hard to live without having that category somewhere in the mess that was inside my head.
3. He really didn't pull punches about sin. So, finding out that actually every single thing I have ever done, and everything I will ever do till the day I die, is full of sin (like fat in a steak), was very bad news. But it was and is believable, and more than that, he didn't see it as a complete defeat. Instead, he pointed us to Jesus and his death, and I learned that Jesus' death was not something to rejoice over in a past tense way, but was something I needed for every minute of every day. My sin wasn't a problem I could ever solve, but Jesus' death was not something I could ever 'use up' either.
4. He didn't bother with illustrations or fancy packaging. I like that in a preacher. Slickness is just unsatisfying in the end. Some people need it, I think, but some people don't, and he so didn't need it. I always felt engaged in serious conversations, rather than watching a collection of parlour tricks.
5. There are three things I still vividly remember reading (I remember where I was even!) and I think they gave me categories that have been particularly useful:
a. 'When people speak badly of you, and even when they say things about you that aren't true, they'll never actually capture how bad you really are'.
Which is cold comfort, but is useful to quell defensiveness.
b. 'If you want a spiritual experience, you'll get one. You might not get a spiritual experience of God, but you'll get a spiritual experience'.
This stopped me in my tracks and (I still remember when my heart started beating again), made me start to change the priorities I had when relating to God.
c. 'As human beings we are much more comfortable speaking about God than speaking about Christ, and we will move away from speaking about Christ to speaking about God'.
I wasn't sure he was right about this (horror!), but I totally get it now. I deliberately talk about Jesus sometimes to people who want to tell me all about their faith. They don't like it at all and go back to talking about 'God'. It's a good check up question for myself as well.
Such a very long post. But this is why I think the Doctor is a dude.
*This was actually accidental, but I left in for Synergy to appreciate, and for Carawen to go 'ew'.
Sunday, 29 April 2007
Friday, 20 April 2007
I've been Torranced!
I've been reading Torrance's book on Calvin's view of humanity, including the image of God. I've also been reading Barth's Church Dogmatics on humanity.
I started to notice yesterday how much Barth was influenced by Calvin.
This worried me. Torrance was a fervent disciple of Barth. His claims regarding Calvin's theology are substantiated by a dazzling number of mostly one sentence quotations from Calvin's commentaries, sermons and his Institutes. But his account of Calvin's view of humanity is different to every other commentator on Calvin, and my own reading of Calvin simply hasn't picked up some of these elements. But it could be me... and all the other commentators.
Except the things that Torrance claims for Calvin are all present in Barth. In fact, reading the book on Calvin's view of humanity has actually helped me make more sense of Barth.
Thanks Torrance.
I started to notice yesterday how much Barth was influenced by Calvin.
This worried me. Torrance was a fervent disciple of Barth. His claims regarding Calvin's theology are substantiated by a dazzling number of mostly one sentence quotations from Calvin's commentaries, sermons and his Institutes. But his account of Calvin's view of humanity is different to every other commentator on Calvin, and my own reading of Calvin simply hasn't picked up some of these elements. But it could be me... and all the other commentators.
Except the things that Torrance claims for Calvin are all present in Barth. In fact, reading the book on Calvin's view of humanity has actually helped me make more sense of Barth.
Thanks Torrance.
Tuesday, 17 April 2007
FAQ
OK, it seems I have to clear a few things up. So, here goes.
1. The names. What is with the names? We have names, why not use those? Well, yes. I acknowledge that you all have names and that the replacement of a person's name implies a divine authority of some kind, which I (clearly) do not have. But this website is a haven, my friends, a place of refuge from the cruel world, which hassles those of us who play computer games. Here, if you have the good sense to play a computer game in which you have a name and I am aware of this, then I will use this name. Hence, Lynxx is honoured with his avatar's name (as is Carawen).
The rest of you? Well, you can make do with a name I come up with for you. Is it fair? Of course not. But how is it fair, gentle reader, for me to endure the pejorative remarks of those individuals who cannot abide the reality that a Christian woman plays computer games in her spare time? This is particularly difficult to take from people who spend hours watching sport (where they don't even do anything. I, at least, am a skilled leatherworker). So, this blog is a safe haven, where if you play computer games and have therefore an alternate name (of your own choosing), you are honoured and may keep it. The rest of you can fit in with this program in this reality.
2. Leaving the country. Folks, it's looking like it will happen. Despite the passport office demanding new photos of me without my glasses. (Looooonnnng story; best not to ask). Despite the hassle of opening a bank account in the UK here without going to Hong Kong (and yes, best not to ask). Despite Levor having to write a special letter to the visa office explaining that he would like his wife to accompany him to the UK. (So, OK he hasn't written yet, but I'm thinking he probably will, or I'll write it for him and get him to sign it...) And despite, yes, despite all the crazy cows (and people) who reside there; not that we can really claim sanity. The jigsaw is slowly coming together despite these hiccups. But we will miss you all; that is beyond doubt.
3. Levor and his marking. OK. So, I was banking on this anonymity thing. D'oh. It's mostly because it takes about an hour to mark an essay and it is soooooooooooo tiring. To keep himself engaged, he entertains himself by interacting with the essay. And he doesn't usually check who the student numbers are unless he detects unbelievable brilliance. I didn't know there were any students reading this.
4. Lack of blogging, subtlety suggested by Synergy (the first syllable of whose name was chosen for a reason, let the reader understand). It's Barth's fault. I have to read 321 pages and understand them by the end of next week. The reading I am managing. The understanding is a little more difficult. I am also discovering that I have taken on too many things (surprise, surprise), and have to scramble just to get all the urgent things done. And sleep. I've become quite committed to sleep, although I suppose I could demonstrate my dedication to this blogsite and lose sleep over it.
5. And yes, TasAng Photographer-Man (which is a dodgy name, but I'm tired, I'm losing sleep here!), let's catch up before September 19th. That would be cool!
I think I have dealt with all the issues arising from the recent correspondence and I hope everyone feels at peace with their inner selves. I know I do.
Good night, y'all.
1. The names. What is with the names? We have names, why not use those? Well, yes. I acknowledge that you all have names and that the replacement of a person's name implies a divine authority of some kind, which I (clearly) do not have. But this website is a haven, my friends, a place of refuge from the cruel world, which hassles those of us who play computer games. Here, if you have the good sense to play a computer game in which you have a name and I am aware of this, then I will use this name. Hence, Lynxx is honoured with his avatar's name (as is Carawen).
The rest of you? Well, you can make do with a name I come up with for you. Is it fair? Of course not. But how is it fair, gentle reader, for me to endure the pejorative remarks of those individuals who cannot abide the reality that a Christian woman plays computer games in her spare time? This is particularly difficult to take from people who spend hours watching sport (where they don't even do anything. I, at least, am a skilled leatherworker). So, this blog is a safe haven, where if you play computer games and have therefore an alternate name (of your own choosing), you are honoured and may keep it. The rest of you can fit in with this program in this reality.
2. Leaving the country. Folks, it's looking like it will happen. Despite the passport office demanding new photos of me without my glasses. (Looooonnnng story; best not to ask). Despite the hassle of opening a bank account in the UK here without going to Hong Kong (and yes, best not to ask). Despite Levor having to write a special letter to the visa office explaining that he would like his wife to accompany him to the UK. (So, OK he hasn't written yet, but I'm thinking he probably will, or I'll write it for him and get him to sign it...) And despite, yes, despite all the crazy cows (and people) who reside there; not that we can really claim sanity. The jigsaw is slowly coming together despite these hiccups. But we will miss you all; that is beyond doubt.
3. Levor and his marking. OK. So, I was banking on this anonymity thing. D'oh. It's mostly because it takes about an hour to mark an essay and it is soooooooooooo tiring. To keep himself engaged, he entertains himself by interacting with the essay. And he doesn't usually check who the student numbers are unless he detects unbelievable brilliance. I didn't know there were any students reading this.
4. Lack of blogging, subtlety suggested by Synergy (the first syllable of whose name was chosen for a reason, let the reader understand). It's Barth's fault. I have to read 321 pages and understand them by the end of next week. The reading I am managing. The understanding is a little more difficult. I am also discovering that I have taken on too many things (surprise, surprise), and have to scramble just to get all the urgent things done. And sleep. I've become quite committed to sleep, although I suppose I could demonstrate my dedication to this blogsite and lose sleep over it.
5. And yes, TasAng Photographer-Man (which is a dodgy name, but I'm tired, I'm losing sleep here!), let's catch up before September 19th. That would be cool!
I think I have dealt with all the issues arising from the recent correspondence and I hope everyone feels at peace with their inner selves. I know I do.
Good night, y'all.
Tuesday, 10 April 2007
A Ticket to Ride...
Here I sit in Levor's office because we don't have internet access at home at the moment and we both have work to do. Levor's work consists of marking, which means my work* is interrupted by a series of grunts, bursts of laughter, chortles and exclamations. It can be quite amusing from time to time in a black kind of way.
But the news... well the news, folks, is that we have tickets! We have one way economy class tickets for 19th September with Thai Airways to fly to the UK. So, we're really going. Or, at least we'll be a lot poorer if we don't go.
Our friends, Earthmother and Lynxx (and Happy Girl) bought me the lonely planet guide to Great Britain for my birthday. I tried to look at it for a few weeks but it was a bit strange, but I've been avidly reading it since we got our tickets. There are all these cool places to go and see things and this cool museum in Oxford which was put together from the pilferings of Charles I's gardener. (I'm not sure why that appeals to me...)
So, we're going on a big aeroplane. How about that.
*Posting, btw is not 'work', just so we're clear. It's procastination.
But the news... well the news, folks, is that we have tickets! We have one way economy class tickets for 19th September with Thai Airways to fly to the UK. So, we're really going. Or, at least we'll be a lot poorer if we don't go.
Our friends, Earthmother and Lynxx (and Happy Girl) bought me the lonely planet guide to Great Britain for my birthday. I tried to look at it for a few weeks but it was a bit strange, but I've been avidly reading it since we got our tickets. There are all these cool places to go and see things and this cool museum in Oxford which was put together from the pilferings of Charles I's gardener. (I'm not sure why that appeals to me...)
So, we're going on a big aeroplane. How about that.
*Posting, btw is not 'work', just so we're clear. It's procastination.
Sunday, 1 April 2007
Confessions of a 'Groupie'
Yesterday was not a good day, up until the point where Levor preached. The service had run long, so he had to ditch the sermon he'd prepared and instead he did a dramatic reading of the text with some others (that had already been arranged) and then took a couple of questions, and then preached the application part. So, it was a bit odd and only took 10 or so minutes (which for those you who know Levor would know is uncharacteristic. And it was particularly funny because he described what he was about to do as a '10 minute phenomenom'. Indeed)
But it was absolutely fantastic!
I haven't heard a sermon on the trial of Jesus from John as good as that one, even though it was mostly not a sermon. Levor drew out the motif of the glory of Christ in real terms (so it didn't sound ethereal and waffly, but real and concrete and... glorious, actually). He covered the authority of Jesus and his actions of love for those around him from the arrest through the trial, without being sentimental.
In fact, the effect was similar to reading the Narnia series - where you're left feeling afterwards as though you've encountered someone you don't ever want to leave and won't be whole without being with them. Most preaching from the Gospels doesn't leave you with that sense, though I'm beginning to think that it should, particularly if preaching from John where I believe we are meant to want to know Jesus and miss not being with him when we leave the book. (I think we should be able to top the Narnia series because we aren't preaching about a lion in a mythical country.) I'd had this thought independent of Levor's sermon last night, but when I was listening to it I thought, "This is it! This is Narnia preaching!"
So, I'm a Levor groupie. He's sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cool. *scream*
But it was absolutely fantastic!
I haven't heard a sermon on the trial of Jesus from John as good as that one, even though it was mostly not a sermon. Levor drew out the motif of the glory of Christ in real terms (so it didn't sound ethereal and waffly, but real and concrete and... glorious, actually). He covered the authority of Jesus and his actions of love for those around him from the arrest through the trial, without being sentimental.
In fact, the effect was similar to reading the Narnia series - where you're left feeling afterwards as though you've encountered someone you don't ever want to leave and won't be whole without being with them. Most preaching from the Gospels doesn't leave you with that sense, though I'm beginning to think that it should, particularly if preaching from John where I believe we are meant to want to know Jesus and miss not being with him when we leave the book. (I think we should be able to top the Narnia series because we aren't preaching about a lion in a mythical country.) I'd had this thought independent of Levor's sermon last night, but when I was listening to it I thought, "This is it! This is Narnia preaching!"
So, I'm a Levor groupie. He's sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cool. *scream*
Friday, 30 March 2007
Rewards... small and great
I had a great time with my exegesis class this morning. We're studying I John, I Peter and James together and I'm trying to teach them how to work with a text exegetically. It's quite a challenge because the class includes women who have only got a year 7 or 8 education through to university educated women, and from those who work in pastoral ministry through to women who haven't really thought about ministry at all. So, not only do I have to be incredibly accessible (while still being challenging enough for those who are totally on-board), but I also have to work at applying different things in different ways, so that everyone feels the relevance of what we are studying.
We're half way through the course now and they handed in their first piece of assessment today, which they've all done well in from what I can see so far. So, I'm feeling good about the course, which I often don't because the lectures are three hours long and by the end of them everyone is exhausted.
But today was fun. They are really getting the hang of finding the main point of the passage in the passage and have started to be comfortable with me asking them to argue their case (rather than wait for me to produce the 'right answer'). And in the process I get to challenge their thinking more, which means that better learning takes place.
Today we were looking at I Peter 5:1-4, and in verse 4 it talks of the 'crown of glory' being a reward for faithful service. One of the women was so uncomfortable with this and thought that really the relationship with God was sufficient. We shouldn't need any other reward or indeed look for any other reward. So, I had the privilege of upsetting her world view by asking her what this verse was doing here and whether Jesus had any reward in mind when he suffered and died for our sins. (And when she didn't think so, upsetting her even further by quoting the passage which speaks of Jesus' attention to the 'joy set before him' in going to the cross. One of the other women was scandalised that such a passage could be in the Bible and strongly disagreed with it!) She's going to take it up with her minister and pastoral team, she told me afterwards....
I'll miss teaching when we go to Oxford. It takes so much energy but it is worthwhile in ways I never expect.
We're half way through the course now and they handed in their first piece of assessment today, which they've all done well in from what I can see so far. So, I'm feeling good about the course, which I often don't because the lectures are three hours long and by the end of them everyone is exhausted.
But today was fun. They are really getting the hang of finding the main point of the passage in the passage and have started to be comfortable with me asking them to argue their case (rather than wait for me to produce the 'right answer'). And in the process I get to challenge their thinking more, which means that better learning takes place.
Today we were looking at I Peter 5:1-4, and in verse 4 it talks of the 'crown of glory' being a reward for faithful service. One of the women was so uncomfortable with this and thought that really the relationship with God was sufficient. We shouldn't need any other reward or indeed look for any other reward. So, I had the privilege of upsetting her world view by asking her what this verse was doing here and whether Jesus had any reward in mind when he suffered and died for our sins. (And when she didn't think so, upsetting her even further by quoting the passage which speaks of Jesus' attention to the 'joy set before him' in going to the cross. One of the other women was scandalised that such a passage could be in the Bible and strongly disagreed with it!) She's going to take it up with her minister and pastoral team, she told me afterwards....
I'll miss teaching when we go to Oxford. It takes so much energy but it is worthwhile in ways I never expect.
Wednesday, 28 March 2007
List of Things I Am Grateful For...
It is 10am. There are some things which have gone well in my morning. It is important to notice and record them (in case I die before the end of the day). Not that I'm feeling paranoid about today or anything.
Things I am Grateful for:
1. That when I went out to have a blood test this morning, and the nurse taking the blood seemed offended that I had bruises on the inside of my arms (from previous blood tests), and lectured me on this (because clearly it was my fault) - that I didn't take it personally. It's always hard to come back from that if you take it personally and hard to prevent yourself from taking it personally. Particularly in the early pre-coffee part of the morning.
2. That I didn't try to implement all the confusing instructions provided by the nurse about bruising, and came to the realisation fairly quickly that one more bruise wasn't really going to matter that much. If I'd tried to do everything she'd said similtaneously it could have been interesting.
3. That I have a squashy parcel to post. So, when I went to the post office to post a parcel and bought a package for the parcel, after paying for it and the postage, the package promptly shrunk. I have no idea how I'm going to squish the parcel into the package but it is squishy. That is a good thing. If it were structurally incapable of squishy-ness I'd have to go buy another package.
4. That though the post office man couldn't seem to move his lips and had a limited vocabularly, it still was possible to communicate with him, even very slowly. And I wasn't rude to him, even though I really really wanted to be.
5. That it seems rather easy (despite communication issues) to make a passport application appointment, because I am going to need to change this appointment.
6. That I have been allowed to live with Levor as his wife although the certificate proving this is deficient, having been issued by the man who married us and was there on the day we were married, rather than the administrative gatekeepers of QLD, who require as proof of our marriage, my drivers license and passport. Obviously.
7. That although I need to acquire a certificate of marriage to have this passport application appointment, the QLD Department of Births, Deaths and Marriages hasn't closed down. This was my fear while I waited on the phone this morning on hold for 17 minutes while the recording told me over and over again of the Department's opening hours in a crackly voice. I think it's the sheer efficiency of QLD that I miss the most now that I live south of the border.
8. That by paying double the amount of money for this piece of paper I can receive it in a quarter of the time I would normally need to wait, further expiditing the passport application process.
9. That when I was carrying my warm, creamy coffee that I was so looking forward to drinking, and I dropped it, I didn't scald myself and I didn't curse the people who are incapable of buying lids which fit the top of plastic cups properly.
10. That there were two mouthfuls left in the cup after I dropped it and that I had the foresight to drink these mouthfuls immediately in the car park before taking another step.
11. That when I went to the bins to throw the cup out only to find that all the bins were out, that there was not a dead body near where the bins are kept (like there was last August). I wasn't really in the zone to find a dead body this morning.
12. That there was no death or structural damage caused by me this morning. Not to be taken for granted.
Things I am Grateful for:
1. That when I went out to have a blood test this morning, and the nurse taking the blood seemed offended that I had bruises on the inside of my arms (from previous blood tests), and lectured me on this (because clearly it was my fault) - that I didn't take it personally. It's always hard to come back from that if you take it personally and hard to prevent yourself from taking it personally. Particularly in the early pre-coffee part of the morning.
2. That I didn't try to implement all the confusing instructions provided by the nurse about bruising, and came to the realisation fairly quickly that one more bruise wasn't really going to matter that much. If I'd tried to do everything she'd said similtaneously it could have been interesting.
3. That I have a squashy parcel to post. So, when I went to the post office to post a parcel and bought a package for the parcel, after paying for it and the postage, the package promptly shrunk. I have no idea how I'm going to squish the parcel into the package but it is squishy. That is a good thing. If it were structurally incapable of squishy-ness I'd have to go buy another package.
4. That though the post office man couldn't seem to move his lips and had a limited vocabularly, it still was possible to communicate with him, even very slowly. And I wasn't rude to him, even though I really really wanted to be.
5. That it seems rather easy (despite communication issues) to make a passport application appointment, because I am going to need to change this appointment.
6. That I have been allowed to live with Levor as his wife although the certificate proving this is deficient, having been issued by the man who married us and was there on the day we were married, rather than the administrative gatekeepers of QLD, who require as proof of our marriage, my drivers license and passport. Obviously.
7. That although I need to acquire a certificate of marriage to have this passport application appointment, the QLD Department of Births, Deaths and Marriages hasn't closed down. This was my fear while I waited on the phone this morning on hold for 17 minutes while the recording told me over and over again of the Department's opening hours in a crackly voice. I think it's the sheer efficiency of QLD that I miss the most now that I live south of the border.
8. That by paying double the amount of money for this piece of paper I can receive it in a quarter of the time I would normally need to wait, further expiditing the passport application process.
9. That when I was carrying my warm, creamy coffee that I was so looking forward to drinking, and I dropped it, I didn't scald myself and I didn't curse the people who are incapable of buying lids which fit the top of plastic cups properly.
10. That there were two mouthfuls left in the cup after I dropped it and that I had the foresight to drink these mouthfuls immediately in the car park before taking another step.
11. That when I went to the bins to throw the cup out only to find that all the bins were out, that there was not a dead body near where the bins are kept (like there was last August). I wasn't really in the zone to find a dead body this morning.
12. That there was no death or structural damage caused by me this morning. Not to be taken for granted.
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