The Angels Have Left the Building!

I have a confession to make.

I do not like publicity, whether it is good or bad. Of course, good publicity tickles my pride, but it makes me conspicuous and I really don't like that. And bad publicity messes with my head and I find myself slightly freaked out.

And I'm married to a guy who is going to attract bad publicity throughout our lifetime. He will always call a spade a spade, and even kindly offer to label the different parts of the spade for those whom he thinks would benefit from such an education. He won't back down on issues of principle, nor where he sees someone in a powerless or relatively powerless position being treated unfairly, and he's in a position to do something about it. He will put himself on the line rather than have people think that he is wonderful, and frequently goes out of his way to demonstrate to students that he is a broken vessel so that they don't think too highly of him by showing them aspects of himself which other people would keep hidden under all circumstances. He won't pretend to believe what other people want him to believe, whether he is from their 'party' or not. Of course, like everyone he does it well sometimes, and other times clumsily. Sometimes the effect of his actions don't match his intentions, but I honestly can't think of many times over the years I've known him where he hasn't acted out of a desire to further the interests of others.

I admire him immensely for these things. And for his ability to count the cost of each of them, and decide to wear it, so that when it comes back to bite him he isn't resentful and doesn't think someone 'owes' him because he did the right thing.

I do however want to invent a machine which beeps when the angels leave. When the angels fear to tread somewhere and they all take off - I think then is a good time to sit down and be quiet. And its usually the time when Levor starts to speak. Actually, to be honest, it is usually the time when someone needs to speak if the principle or the person are to be defended. But increasingly, I am beginning to realise that Levor is one of those someone's, and that it is likely that he will be increasingly visible. And so I have forlorn hopes that we could get a machine which beeps, so that at least he knows when that situation is happening. Not that it would change anything.

I really don't want to change him, because there are so few people like this, and he is quintessentially like this. And I really admire it. But the cost is so high.

One of the things I was really looking forward to when we came to Oxford was sinking out the public eye for a while. And it has been so nice. I thought to myself that I would have a few years to get my head together on the issue before we came back to Sydney and quite possibly found Levor cutting a more public figure. Time to work through the anger and defensiveness and the desire to say, "But does it have to be you?"
But already - after a month - Levor is currently engaged in debate on a particular blogsite designed to demonstrate that Sydney Anglicans are heretics. These guys are going to paste him. He knows that, but he tries to engage them anyway, being firm (but not strident) and asking genuine questions.

Me? I would say that they weren't worth engaging with. I wouldn't even bother reading the blog. I wouldn't care about them. They are jerks. (Who sets up a blog just to attack a group of fellow Christians???)

Levor? Totally engaging with them - at least having a go and drawing on training with lots of other similar situations in an attempt to engage them for their good. Because he does care. And in the process he's using his real name.

The angels have left the building. *beep* *beep* *beep*